Hey, look! A thing.

turntechlongbottom:

thatswhattimelordsdo:

sherlocksblanket:

ivegotthatsuperbenedict:

astudyintime:

fexual:

What is your battle cry?

lightbulbb:

Lo! Who is that, prowling over the freeway! It is Beth, hands clutching a vorpal blade! And with a cruel grunt, her voice cometh:

“I’m going to smash you until the cops have to tear me off your wraithly spirit!!

Lo! Who is that, skulking over the tarmac! It is Fexual, hands clutching a sharpened screwdriver! She howls vengefully:

“I’m going to transmogrify everything you hold dear!!”

Lo! Who is that, running on the tarmac! It is Angie, hands clutching a jeweled meat hammer! She howls gutterally:

“I’m going to pummel you with such wanton cruelty, your reincarnation will be a scientific anomaly!”

Hark! Who is that, running over the candy store! It is Ivegotthatsuperbenedict, hands clutching a reflective halberd! And with an ominous grunt, his voice cometh:

“In the name of malice, I desecrate like a sentient bulldozer!”

Zang! Who is that, stalking over the desert! It is Simon, hands clutching a piece of chainlink fence! And with a mighty grunt, his voice cometh:

“By Odin’s mighty spear, I burn with the holy fires of destruction!!!”

YESSSSSSSSS

Who is that, stalking across the wasteland? It is Chris, hands clutching a jeweled meat hammer! He screams mightily:

“I’m going to pulverize you until you are tax deductible, and dip you in uranium!!!”

Stalking on the freeway, clutching a reflective halberd, cometh Roranicus! And he gives a booming cry:

“I’m going to spank you like a first grade teacher, and add a notch to my bedpost!”

Striding amidst the plains, wielding a bladed baseball bat, cometh JackPendragon! And he gives an ominous grunt:

“I’m going to beat you so utterly, you will polymorph into your grandmother!!!”

(Source: chantillyxlacey)